Meanwhile, Over at the Other Blog...

Today I'm over at my other blog writing about our awesome experience at the Arizona Homeschool Convention! If you're interested (or potentially interested) in homeschooling, hop on over and read about the awesome time we had!

Needing Help From Blogger Friends!

Okay, ladies... I need your help! Can anyone help with this issue?

I use the Blogger Reader (on my blog dashboard) to subscribe to blogs. It works beautifully, except for one thing - it won't let me unsubscribe from a blog. Subscribing is possible, but I cannot find out how to unsubscribe. Can anyone tell me how to do this?

If I click on the icon that says "manage reading list," it takes a super-long time to load the page and then says, "cannot do this, try again later." And this is not new - this happens every time.

I have tried using "View in Google Reader," which will "let" me unsubscribe, with one caveat - the blogs that I "unsubscribe" to are still there after unsubscribing!

Beyond frustrating.

What makes this even more frustrating is the fact that I have recently been spontaneously subscribed to some weird "near-porn" blog (where did this come from???) and, of course, I can't unsubscribe from it - or the other fifty or so blogs I'd like to drop from my reader.

I would love some help if anyone knows the secret!

Taming the Birth Snark

Anyone who has read this blog for any length of time knows that I am a stickler for civil discourse during disagreements. I absolutely adore calm intellectual debate in which participants can keep their tempers and their sense of humor, and in which people are polite and loving even while they disagree. What I cannot stand (and will immediately delete) are commenters or discussions that are rude, belligerent, combative, or unkind in any way.

Something that has bothered me greatly as I survey the web is the large amount of bullying that I see going on. Articles written to bully, belittle, or humiliate other writers. "The Mommy Wars." Or when a group of people will actually get together to form a website whose sole purpose is to attack and criticize a blogger or other internet persona. It's sad, and it's sick. I would have hoped for better things (though perhaps not, knowing human nature).

But of course, I would be above such things! (*Insert nose-in-the-air look of haughty superiority*) Of course I would.... until I get smacked upside the head with a reminder of my own sinful nature and the need I have of remembering to be kind to other writers.

This past week, I read an article on a blog that I otherwise have enjoyed, and it really had me seeing red. Not just a pale, mild-colored red, but a brick-red, steam-breathing red that was shooting flames out of my ears. I was upset almost to the point of tears by this article. (Go read it.)

Don't get me wrong - the article had its good points. And it wasn't an outrageously bad article. But the moral of the article seemed to me to be, "Moms who attempt to have input into their births are selfish control-freaks who are only in it for the experience and don't care about their babies." By logical conclusion, it would therefore be a Christian virtue to be and stay ignorant of beneficial vs. detrimental birthing practices, go to a hospital and immediately hand over one's body and one's baby to the established maternity system without asking any questions. (I expect that I am exaggerating. I usually do when I'm upset.)

And immediately after reading this (and dousing those flames that were streaming out of my ears), I began to craft a mental blog post refuting the above article, point by point.

And it was pure snark. Sarcastic, unkind, judgmental, finger-pointing, rage-type snark. 

("So how about that loving, gentle, civil, kind discussion technique thing you talked about?")

Oh. Oops.

You see, this blog is my attempt at birth activism - bettering birth choices and birth care for women of the world through writing. But what happens when I unleash an inner snark, and my writing becomes bitter, angry, and sarcastic?

Not much.

Sometimes it can be fun preaching to the choir (who usually appreciates a snark or two), but the main point is not preaching to the choir - it's changing the hearts of those who aren't "in the choir" - who need to hear the truth about maternity care and how it can be changed for the better.

I won't be changing any hearts by writing through rage. And though I do occasionally need to use this blog to vent (very few birth workers can avoid venting at least occasionally), my main intent is to write with love in order to change hearts.

So I'll be back at a later date to write a rebuttal to this article - when I've calmed down and am able to write like I should.

In the meantime, feel free to jump over to that article (or the next article on the blog, which made me almost as angry as the first one) and join the discussion! They could seriously use some informed birth workers to chime in. (The writer wrote an extra note to the first article after getting so many comments, which did help a bit.)

How to Invite Public Egging

This week, we have grieved with some friends of ours who are undergoing a devastating child-loss experience. It has been long, and it has been brutally difficult for them, and the outcome was tragic.

When they posted their loss on Facebook this week, one of the first responses was something along the lines of:

"Well, be thankful you've already got one child."

Oh, oh, oh. Dear readers, please do not say this to grieving parents who have just lost a child. Having a living child does not make a loss more bearable, or less tragic. A baby is a baby. A loss is a loss is a loss. Grieving with them, showing love and compassion and commiseration - great. Trying to reason people out of their grief - not okay.

Here's a great list of what not to say to a mother who has miscarried.

The Answer to the Big Question

Okay, folks.... It's time to wrap up my year-and-a-half research mission into the big question....

"Does a very-low-carbohydrate diet work to prevent hyperemesis gravidarum (severe morning sickness)?"


And the answer, the definitive answer, based on eighteen months of research and one practical experiment during our last pregnancy, is....

Hop on over to my other blog today to read the rest of the article!

A Rabbit Trail Leading to... Magnesium?

Yesterday I was reading one of my favorite blogs, and I found her posting on the severe morning sickness she is currently experiencing with her newest babe.

Then, because I always do, I spent some time reading the comments and gleaning information from those. There's always so much in the comments! I was fascinated by this comment conversation:

Commenter: "Sorry you are so sick! Have you read this blog post about magnesium? It worked for me! http://www.mommypotamus.com/the-real-cause-of-morning-sickness/"  

Amy (blog author): "I did, but I’ve had a blood workup and don’t have a magnesium deficiency." 

Commenter: "Its funny mine actually appeared fine too, but then I read something about magnesium being stored mostly in the cells and not the blood so the test is not that accurate unless you have deathly low levels. I don’t know that much about it, just that taking magnesium oil was a huge help to me! Hope you get to feeling better soon! 

" ... This may be helpful … From the Magnesium Miracle by Dr. Carolyn Dean:

"'Another reason that Dr. Altura felt magnesium was not given its due is because there has been no lab test that will give an accurate reading of the magnesium status in the tissues. Only one percent of magnesium of the body is distributed in the blood, making a simple sample of magnesium in the blood highly inaccurate. That’s why most doctors who rely on blood tests for magnesium and not magnesium deficiency signs and symptoms and realization that up to 80 percent of the population is deficient, will miss an important diagnosis.'"

So, of course, I headed right over to read said article, and found it fascinating:

The REAL Cause of Morning Sickness

She writes:

"You’ve Probably Heard By Now . . .

 "That cortisol (the stress hormone) can cause weight gain, but did you know that’s because one of it’s main functions is to increase blood sugar? Yep, excess cortisol in your system takes your blood sugar through huge spikes and crashes, resulting in fatigue and nausea (aka morning sickness). Normally, magnesium balances cortisol levels by cleaning the excess from our blood.

 "BUT -

 "Pregnancy hormones inhibit our ability to absorb magnesium! This can lead to a vicious cycle in which excess stress hormones cause nausea, which causes stress, which we can’t fully remedy because the very thing we need we can’t fully absorb... 

 "That’s Why The Secret To Morning Sickness . . . Is to build up your magnesium stores before getting pregnant!"

Head on over to read the whole article, as well as the comments, and then check out her other article, "7 Real Food Remedies for Morning Sickness That Actually Work."

Great stuff all around! What do you guys think?

As for me.... I went to Sprouts and bought some mineral drops and Magnesium Oil. It can't hurt!

And really, let's face it - pregnancy is hard on a woman's body. And a severe-NVP pregnancy is super-hard on the body. It only makes sense to spend time and energy in between pregnancies building up our bodies in every way that we possibly can so that our bodies are as strong and whole as possible when they are challenged once again.

Also, I recall that magnesium was a vital part in the HG-treatment written about in this article.

Can you guys tell I'm on a blogging spree? A blogger can go only so long without blogging before she throws up her hands and says, "That's it! Everybody hold everything, I've got to blog!"

I think I need to blog more regularly so I can avoid the blogging frenzy.

Anyhow, thoughts?

Thoughts on "Morning Sickness Is Healthy"

I've recently thought a lot about the beliefs that our culture (and the medical community) holds about morning sickness. There are a lot of them, but they can be summarized thus: "Morning sickness is a natural, normal, and even healthy part of pregnancy." After pondering this for a while, I have decided to question this belief, based on the lines of evidence and thought that I will list below.

I hope that each of my readers will feel free to leave input, either in agreement or disagreement - I'd love to discuss this subject further.

To separate the different parts of this discussion, I'm going to write out different lines of current belief about NVP (Nausea and Vomiting of Pregnancy) and then list why I believe them to be invalid, or at least questionable. Here goes:

"Morning sickness must be healthy because a pregnant woman with morning sickness is less likely to miscarry than a woman who has no morning sickness."

I think that this is one of those situations in which accurate evidence can be used to draw inaccurate conclusions.

To demonstrate, I am going to be wildly unscientific and just make up numbers to demonstrate my point. Both my numbers and my scenarios will be intensely inaccurate, but I hope they will illustrate my point. If you think I've seriously screwed up, please let me know.

Let's say that there are two types of women in the general population - women who, when doused with your average dose of pregnancy hormones, will develop some sort of NVP, and women who will be blithely unaffected when given the same (i.e. during pregnancy).

Let us also say that viable pregnancies will present with normal levels of pregnancy hormones, while non-viable pregnancies (pregnancies in which the baby is doomed to die very small and which will end in an early miscarriage) present with lower-than-normal levels of pregnancy hormones. In most cases, this is true - there are non-viable pregnancies that present with normal hormone levels, and vice versa, but one indicator of a coming miscarriage is lower-than-normal hormone levels. This is why I only experienced very low-level nausea with our first pregnancy, which was a blighted ovum pregnancy - lower hormone levels.

Now, let's just do some (very) basic math, assuming (just for the purposes of illustration - this is not real life) that 50% of women are NVP-type, and 50% of women are non-NVP-type, and that 50% of pregnancies are viable and 50% of pregnancies are non-viable. Here's how it would come out:

NVP-type woman + viable pregnancy = NVP (25%)
NVP-type woman + non-viable pregnancy = no NVP (25%) - will end in miscarriage
non-NVP-type woman + viable pregnancy = no NVP (25%)
non-NVP-type woman + non-viable pregnancy = no NVP (25%) - will end in miscarriage

In this highly hypothetical situation, you would have a 0% change of miscarriage with an NVP pregnancy (or in reality, just a low chance), and a 67% chance of miscarriage with a non-NVP pregnancy. Thus, doctors and other caregivers will say, "It's better to have NVP because that means the pregnancy is healthy."

Well, yes.... but no.

What is really means is non-viable pregnancies are included in the "non-NVP" group so that the chance of miscarriage looks artificially high. The statistics may be true for non-NVP pregnancies as a whole (i.e. averaged), but in individual cases, the chance of miscarriage is either certain due to non-viability, or very low because this is a healthy pregnancy in a non-NVP woman/pregnancy.

Have I succeeded in making any coherent point yet?

My point is that morning sickness is not an inherently healthy state. Both NVP and non-NVP pregnancies produce healthy babies. Pediatricians do not ask, "Did you have morning sickness? No? That's bad... we can expect your baby to have health problems." No, babies derive no (known) benefit from having been gestated by NVP-type mothers. But when non-viable pregnancies are grouped in with viable non-NVP pregnancies, the risk of miscarriage looks artificially high for those viable pregnancies and makes morning sickness look (mistakenly) like it is a healthy or desired state.

If anyone out there is thinking, "This woman's methods are madness! She should be brought up before the National Academy of Sciences and shot!" - I know all that. This is just supposed to be the jumping-off point for thought. I'd love to hear everyone's input on this.

Next on the list....

"Morning sickness is a beneficial characteristic that keeps the developing baby safe from dangerous food-borne toxins."


If you look on just about any article on the subject of morning sickness, some form of the above will be recorded. "Morning sickness develops to keep the mother from eating foods that might harm her baby in the developing stages."

I see several reasons to question this conclusion.

(1) Morning sickness is, to my best knowledge, not seen (or at least not seen often) in the animal kingdom - If morning sickness were so awesome, it seems to me that it would be present among other mammalian mothers.

(2) Morning sickness in itself is disadvantageous to both mother and baby - In the moderate to severe forms, morning sickness prevents a woman from eating, drinking, searching for food, caring for her already-born children, moving, or being able to avoid dangers. In the most severe forms, it can mean absolute debilitation, long-term health effects, or even death for either the baby or the mother and the baby both. This is hardly an advantage. It is much more advantageous for a mother to be able to move, eat, care for herself and her children, and be able to keep herself nourished and hydrated.

(3) When was the last time you heard someone say, "Gosh, I had morning sickness so badly that all I was able to eat was fresh, organic spinach and beet salad with a side of fresh salmon"? That's right, never. You're more likely to hear, "I was so sick all I could keep down was pop tarts and Kool-Aid." The list of "things I could tolerate" during NVP usually runs the gamut of every junk food known to man - candy, slushies, cookies, soda, you name it. During the first half of my pregnancy with our eldest, I consumed primarily Ensure, Slim-Fast, and Jell-O, moving on to bagels and ice cream - that's right, pure junk. And pure junk that was absolutely loaded with toxins. This one just doesn't make sense.

(4) Even if mild morning sickness is advantageous, the same cannot be said of the severe types that cause debilitating nausea, inability to eat, malnourishment, dehydration, permanent adverse health effects, and/or death. There is nothing advantageous about that - quite the contrary.

"Morning sickness is just a normal part of pregnancy."

To me, this statement is utterly disproved by the fact that, historically, there have been some cultures observed by researchers in which morning sickness was rare or almost unknown.


This definitely seems to point toward a causation based on health, diet, or other environmental factors.

And it certainly shows that, somehow or other, NVP is avoidable on a cultural level. The question is how to find out the factors involved in this miracle!

***

I'd love to hear what you all think on the above.

Summary:

Modern science/culture says: Morning sickness is normal. Morning sickness is healthy. Morning sickness is advantageous.

I would question and/or doubt each of those statements.

Thoughts:

My guess is that morning sickness means that something is.... off. Something is not quite right with our bodies. I have no idea what that "something" is. Is it some sort of deficiency? Is it gut health? Is it body alkalinity? Is it some combination of factors? Are there multiple modes of causation?

Hard to tell.

I know that evidence is currently being gathered that shows a genetic link for hyperemesis gravidarum, and that's wonderful. Anything to get to the root of the problem, and also to show caregivers (once and for all!) that this stuff is not in our heads. That's awesome.

But... with many conditions, there are genetic tendencies/vulnerabilities... and there are environmental or health-based triggers that cause the genes to activate. Genes are not always our destinies... but they are our vulnerabilities.

Example 1: Rheumatoid arthritis runs in my husband's mother's family. She developed it when she was 22, and it nearly killed her. Her sister, with the same gene, didn't develop it until her seventies. Why? Because having a certain gene does not always mean that the gene will be activated - it takes environmental triggers, whatever those were.

Example 2: Celiac disease - it's genetic, but it often requires environmental triggers to activate (usually gluten exposure). Celiac rates exploded astronomically in Ireland when the Irish switched from potatoes to wheat as their main food source - a case of genetic susceptibility plus environmental triggers.

All that being said, I believe that there is a cure for NVP and for hyperemesis. Not a drug cure, to cover the symptoms of an already-developed disease (though that would be nice too!), but a pre-conception cure that will correct whatever metabolic or bodily systems have gone awry so that pregnancy becomes a misery (in mild cases) or a threat to our lives and our babies' lives (in severe cases).

What do you all think? Is morning sickness a healthy state, or a pathological one? Any input? I'd love to hear what you all think! As always, input must be civil and polite (or the delete-comment-monster will be released!). Chime in, please!

Finding a Passion

I haven't always been an over-the-top birth junkie. There was, in fact, a time in which I was quite normal and in which childbirth was just vaguely interesting to me.

When I was a child, actually, I wanted to be a veterinarian. This was not, I realized later, because I had any deep interest in healing sick and injured animals - it was just a love-affair (still ongoing!) with the wonderful and amazing works of British country vet James Herriot (if you haven't read these - go get them now!). Though, looking back, I now see that all of the chapters that fascinated me most were those dealing with any obstetrical situations - foalings, calvings, farrowings, etc. An interesting glimpse into the future, for sure, though I misinterpreted it at the time.

I spent various time throughout high school and college flirting with various lines of study - environmental science, biology, music, and patisserie - but I cannot say that I had a passion for any of them, a passion being defined as "anything that I want to spend masses of time studying voluntarily, apart from required assignments." So when I got married, I was glad to leave all of that behind. I have always loved being a homemaker anyhow, with or without kids (I love developing and practicing the arts of homemaking!), so there was no love lost when I left my studies behind.

But when we had our first child, all of that changed. During our pregnancy, I borrowed almost all of my midwife's lending library of books and videos, and I read voraciously. About a year after our baby's birth, I was still borrowing books and reading at least three at a time - and then, suddenly, I realized that I didn't just want to read "expecting parents" books. I wanted to read midwifery textbooks. And furthermore, I wanted to study it seriously! Around the clock! I couldn't get enough of it.

And so, another birth junkie was born! Several months later I attended my first birth conference, given by my second-midwife-to-be (where I got to hear Henci Goer and talk with Laura Shanley), and a few months later my birth blog was born. I was off and running.

At that time, I assumed that I would follow the standard pattern of birth junkie-ism: I would start a birth blog (done!), then train and work as a birth doula, and then eventually apprentice as a homebirth midwife. It looked like a fairly straight path. The fact that I had little to no time to work as a doula or midwife did occur to me, but I figured that that would work itself out. (I know that many moms work as doulas or midwives, but I am not good at multi-tasking like that - but at the time I figured that I would learn to love it.) There was also the slight fact that I am not a good people person and have few to none of the personality traits that make good doulas or midwives - but I figured that that too would work out. This was the standard path, after all! It would just have to work out.

But several factors intervened.

Firstly, our son turned one. And the terrible twos hit. (I don't know what this thing is about the "terrible twos" - it's really the "terrible ones through fours"). And it hit me smack in the middle of the eyes that I needed to get my head OUT of the birth world and into the world of hard-core parenting, where I desperately needed prayer, study, mentoring, and hard work (and still do). And so I made a hard decision - to deliberately neglect my birth-book habit of reading and read parenting books instead. This is something I still do - in fact, I have about five parenting books going right now ("Raising Real Men" - "Raising Godly Tomatoes" - "A Survivor's Guide to Homeschooling" - "Shepherding a Child's Heart" - "A Mom Just Like You" -  "The Five Love Languages of Children" - "The Key to Your Child's Heart"). And I actually haven't read more than one or two birth books in the past couple of years. This was a major change for me, and a very positive one. I needed to change my focus, and I needed the help of godly parents who had gone before me. For this reason I am also very thankful to be surrounded by so many godly older moms at my church, who have done an awesome job raising their little ones and are now a wonderful resource for me as a younger and struggling mother.

Secondly, our other two little ones came along, meaning two more rough pregnancies and life adjustments.

Thirdly, we began to homeschool - which meant even less time for blogging or thinking of other things to do with my non-existent spare time.

But over the past couple of years, the question has continually come up - "I'm a birth junkie... I need to do something with this passion. What can I do? What can I do?"

And in His own good way, God has given me answers and put that question to rest for now.

Firstly, a little over a year ago, I had the opportunity to take a great weekend doula training in Phoenix. I thoroughly enjoyed the training (it's fun! do one!), but most importantly, it revealed quite clearly one important fact - I am not made to be a doula. I had always suspected that I would be a rotten doula, but the fact came home to me very solidly when the midwife teaching the training assigned the class to take turns giving each other massages (a classic doula technique). My reaction was something along the lines of, "Oh, my goodness. Gross. No. Please, no." And thankfully my baby, who was with me, generously and kindly decided to scream during that part of the session, giving me a very thankful and graceful exit. But I realized that someone like me, who has definite issues with touching people should not be a birth doula!

That was a wonderful realization, and it gave me a lot of peace. I had had it in my mind that I should work as a doula, regardless of whether or not I wanted to - because that's just what birth junkies do! But it has been made quite clear to me that I would not make a good doula, nor would I enjoy the work. God may develop me over the years into someone who would make a good doula - or midwife, as the same issues apply - but it is not for now.

Secondly, I have realized that my calling is 100% at home. Right now, with three children - and the possibility of more - plus a home and a homeschool, I have absolutely zero time for outside hobbies as large as any type of birth work. I would have to seriously neglect some aspect of my home or family (or personal sanity) in order to pursue any type of birth work, and there is no need for that (not to mention the fact that it would harm my family). And God has given me perfect peace about that.

As a matter of fact, I have absolutely no idea what type of birth work I would choose to do were I at a place to pursue a job or a career. I do not have the characteristics needed to work as - or to enjoy work as - a doula, a midwife, a lactation consultant, or a childbirth educator. Nursing sounds fun, but there's the slight issue of my fainting at the sight of needles - and of having to obey orders from doctors that go against every rule of medical ethics and good medicine in the L&D ward (L&D nurses that I know tell me that this is an incredibly stressful part of their jobs).

But, as I mentioned, right now, the question is closed. I am a worker-at-home, a homeschool teacher, and a wife and mother. Unless God specifically calls our family to another plan, this is my calling for now and - most likely - for many, many more years to come. Thankfully, after many years of questioning, praying, wondering, and researching, I am completely at peace with leaving my ambitions as a birth worker (of whatever type) alone and just proceeding as a homemaker who does a wee bit of birth blogging as recreation. That is God's plan, and it is good.

And later.... who knows? The possibilities are endless. But I shall leave that with God, and for the future. For now, it's one less thing to worry about - and that is a blessing.

Birth Wishes - How They Came Out!

I wrote this list of birth and pregnancy wishes/goals last July - I thought I would pull them back up and report on how things turned out in the end! I'm leaving the original document intact and adding comments, quote-form italicized.


To feel better soon

I would really like to enjoy this pregnancy, or a majority of it.... So I would love it if the NVP could clear up quickly! Of course, though, I know that I have been blessed beyond measure - NVP but no HG. I'll settle for that if need be. :)

NVP-wise, this was my easiest pregnancy ever, though also my most-puzzling (more later). However, I did feel nauseated till the very end, as usual. But as it never descended into hyperemesis, I won't complain! 

To gain less baby weight

Last time I gained a ton of weight, and almost half of it stayed around after baby and was impossible to get rid of (until I did this recent low carb thing). This time, while not being unhealthy, I want to keep my weight gain in a more reasonable range.

Nope. Gained more. How much more I have no idea, because I stopped weighing myself, but it was quite a bit. However, compared to looking slim and trim with hyperemesis.... I'll take some extra pounds any day!!

Labor with intact membranes, and/or birth en caul

Rumor has it that laboring with intact membranes is much more comfortable, so I'd like to try it! Both of my labors have begun with SROM (spontaneous rupture of membranes), which is handy for timing labor (I know the length of my labors down to the minute) but less comfortable.

It is said that increased vitamin K can help strengthen membranes, so when I'm feeling better, I'm going to try to get back to my green smoothies, which are really high in vitamin K. 

I would also love-love-LOVE a birth en caul, that is, where the baby is born with intact membranes around it. In most traditional cultures there are special traditions and beliefs and blessings surrounding births en caul, and I would love to experience one of those births myself.

You can see some birth en caul pictures here.

I used to think that births en caul were almost impossibly rare, but it turns out that that is not so! They are almost extinct in the hospital environment simply because most doctors insist on rupturing membranes if they have not already released naturally, thus eliminating the possibility of a caul. But the midwives whom I know on Facebook regularly report caul births, so they're not nearly as rare as I once thought (though they are still unusual).

We almost had our caul baby! Membranes broke during second stage (pushing), so only about two minutes - or less - before birth! We were almost there! Maybe next time, assuming there is a next time! 

Make a birth cake

It is common practice for midwives to recommend that mamas - especially first-time mamas - spend their time in early labor making a birthday cake for the baby. It calms nervous energy and gives them something to do, and then the entire birth team can enjoy the cake and celebrate after the birth. Fun!!

I have intended to make a birth cake with both of my births, and failed with each! Both times, labor has grabbed my attention and said "It's time to labor, forget about anything else!" So no birth cake. I'd like to try again.... I'm thinking of mixing up dry ingredients ahead of time so that there wouldn't be too much work to do.

I made my first birth cake!!! So exciting! And how? By making it a good month or two in advance and freezing it!! So much for a labor cake, but it would have been hopeless again - for one thing, labor again claimed my immediate attention, and for another thing labor started in the middle of the night ("How to get the entire household up" - Start banging around in the kitchen at 3:00 a.m.!). But I was so happy that I got this done! Definitely recommend making baby's birth cake in advance!

Maybe another waterbirth

I have had one land birth and one water birth. For labor, water is wonderful-wonderful-WONDERFUL and I will never voluntarily do active labor in any other way!!! For second stage pushing, though, I am okay with land or water. But waterbirths are fun! So it might be fun to have another, even though I'm okay with either one.

Yes, we had our second waterbirth! So happy about that! Love waterbirths!!

Handle labor better, more enjoyably

I guess I'd better just admit it. Though I've had two unmedicated births (and am extremely happy about that!), when it comes to labor, I am just.... bad at it. I've never really gotten the hang of it. All of that "relax, release, deepen" stuff? Well, I'm afraid that my instinctual (and unavoidable) response has been more along the lines of "tighten, tense, panic". I'll never be one of those birthing goddesses that one sees!

But I would like to be able to labor more comfortably. I have wondered if I would benefit from a Brio/Bradley or Hypnobabies course (we took Hypnobirthing with our first, and it did not help). And really, I would love to take one of those classes anyway - I just don't know if I want to (or can!) spend the money. Class costs plus babysitting add up to a considerable price tag! So we'll have to think. I should probably also ask my midwife.

Well.... No. It's time to admit the sad truth - I'm just a labor wimp. I'm afraid I yelled just as much as the first two times - actually, quite a bit more, according to my husband. But I did find the Hypnobabies CD (which I listened to for a month and a half pre-birth) to be very comforting - would definitely do again.

Be able to manage after-pains so as to be able to enjoy first postpartum hour with baby

With both babies, I have had problems with severe afterpains - so severe that I have had to hand the baby off to someone else and just focus on getting through them. Both times I have missed out on bonding/holding time and on the breastfeeding window - that is, the first hour post-birth when baby is awake and alert. After that, they get quite sleepy and initiating breastfeeding is much harder.

With my last birth, I arranged to take four Advil as soon as the baby was born in order to get a head start on the afterpains. That did absolutely nothing for them! Too bad. However, the placenta smoothie that I had a bit later had an amazing effect on afterpains, and with the aid of more placenta medicine my second experience with afterpains, though yucky, was much better than my first. So I already have it written into my birth plan to do a placenta smoothie as soon as is humanly possible, and we'll see what that can do.

If anyone out there is still dry-heaving at the thought of placenta medicine, let me just say - try it before you condemn it, because gosh golly, it WORKS. Amazingly. For postpartum bleeding, for preventing baby blues, for stabilizing emotions, for regaining energy, for afterpains - it truly works. I can't wait to try it again. (And most placenta medicine is encapsulated - that is, the placenta is dried and put into gel caps, so the gross factor is really reduced.)

IT WORKED!!!! Operation After-Pain Take-Down was a success! Raw placenta medicine, Calcium/magnesium supplement, Advil, Arnica, and an afterpains tincture. I would SO do this again!

Have a better start to breastfeeding

I'm afraid that both of our babies have had absolutely disastrous starts to breastfeeding. I thought it was bad with our first.... until we had our second. Yowzer. I would really like to have a baby who takes easily to the breast and does not give us nightmares with breastfeeding!

On that note, I would like to mention the importance of being surrounded by breast-feeding supportive caregivers! I do not think either of our babies would have survived with an intact breastfeeding relationship had we not been covered on all sides by women (midwives, doulas) cheering us on, plus a breastfeeding supportive pediatrician. I had no idea when I started out that breastfeeding could be such a challenge, or that it could require so much support.

Yes! Yes! Yes! It has been SO nice to get a start to breastfeeding that was normal and not utterly catastrophic in some way or another! I love this!! 

Short Second Stage

Most women love the pushing phase during a birth. They feel that they can get involved and be an active participant rather than a bystander (of sorts). I'm the opposite! I really don't like pushing. First time it was an hour or two, second time was..... oh, 20-30 minutes, not sure. But I would LOVE to have one of those one-or-two push births - that would be lovely!

Again, any ladies out there who have not experienced a birth yet, take heart - as I've said - most women really enjoy the pushing phase.

Oh. my. goodness. Let's just say.... I got what I asked for, and it wasn't pretty! But it was nice to have it over with quickly, even if it did feel like a freight train had taken a detour and was thundering through my body for the most intense three minutes of my life! 

A Butter Birth!

A butter birth is a phrase used by midwives to describe a birth that is quick, easy, and where the baby slips out easily "like butter." I would love one of these! Can I put my order in now, please?

From my perspective - Nope. From my midwife's perspective - Who knows? I'll have to ask her, but I don't think so.

But all in all, it was a great birth. Short, not too-too hard, uncomplicated. What more could I ask for? Thanks for all the support, everyone!

Absolutely Astounding: Tricia's Story of Severe Morning Sickness

You have got to read this story!!!

This mama left the link to her story on my blog today, and I spent some time today going through it. One word - WOW. Wow-wow-wow-wow-wow. This is possibly the single most well-documented case of hyperemesis (severe morning sickness) that I have ever read, and it is a splendid resource - lots of writing (both at the time and afterwards) and lots and lots of pics.

Birth junkies (bloggers, etc.) and birth professionals (CBEs, doulas, midwives, nurses) - please take the time to read this story! The best hope that HG mothers have is well-informed pregnancy and birth professionals. This is an awesome resource for learning about severe hyperemesis.

If you need to send an article to someone to explain severe HG, this is it. Please share this around!

My HG Story

Tricia, thank you for sharing! You are a warrior mama!